The Root of Your New Year's Resolution

I can't wait to get back on track.

January 1st can't come soon enough. 

Who's ready for a fresh start?

It's time to say goodbye to 2016!

I. Feel. Gross.

I would bet money that you've heard one of the above phrases this week. The build up to the new year is always categorized by a lot of goal setting and self analysis, especially for women. It's seems like, in the days between Christmas and New Year's, everyone finds something new to hate about themselves. We take inventory of the habits that we've kept up for the past year(s), and we're suddenly appalled by our lack of self control, too much self control, weight loss, weight gain, bad relationship decisions, bad career decisions, and our overall failure to be the person we want to be.

It's ironic, because the new year is supposed to be a joyful season. The holidays can be a painful time, and there are those who truly do need to close the door on 2016 because of tragedy. But for most of us, we manage to switch from an attitude of gratitude to one of self deprecation as soon as the eggnog wears off.

If you feel guilty about how much you ate over the holidays, you're probably setting a game plan to "lose the weight". If you fear being the one friend who isn't engaged in her twenties, you might be swiping right on Tinder as we speak. If you're ashamed of the lack of money you've saved or career progress you've made, maybe you're ready to upheave your entire life and start down a new path.

The problem is, guilt, fear, and shame might give you the motivation to power through January, but they will never allow you to achieve the transformation you want.

I'm all for self-improvement and positive change, but it's heartbreaking to see women push themselves towards a "new" self with little to no regard for the why behind the decision. I'm guilty of this, as well. It's so easy to get caught up in the hype of New Year's Resolutions, that I often forget to take inventory of the blessings of the year that's about to end. We focus so much on the physical side of things that we completely reject our emotional, spiritual, and mental health, and also fail to acknowledge any progress we've made thus far. Giving yourself grace for the weak spots might be the best goal you can set this season.

We have to stop looking at the new year as a chance to change everything and frame it, instead, as an opportunity to become healthier from the inside out. Your goal might be a good one, but if you really want to make a change in 2017, it's time to look at the root of your resolution.